Trying Together
by Alshain
Summary: Zuko and Katara have a lot to learn about each other.  It's going to take a lot of effort on both their parts to do it.  Based on the Zutara Week prompts.
1. Family

**A/N: The chapters of this fic will contain loosely connected vignettes based on the Zutara Week prompts at zutara-week . deviantart .com / blog / 33047058 / (remove spaces). They are all AU (in the true sense of "AU from canon"), beginning after the episode "The Southern Raiders," except for the first, which takes place after "The Western Air Temple." The other six chapters will be posted after the end of Zutara Week due to imminent situations resulting in a lack of internet access on my part.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own A:tLA. I make no profit from the writing of this story, and no copyright infringement is intended.**

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* * *

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**Family**

Zuko watches them. They look like friends. They look like _family_, except for their skin and hair, and the colors of their garments. Zuko notes that he is the only one in red. The Duke, Haru, Teo, and Toph in green, Sokka and Katara in blue, and the Avatar—_Aang,_ he reminds himself—in orange and yellow. He's been careful to learn all their names, even the non-benders' because he needs them all to accept him. So far, in fact, all of them seem to have some measure of trust in him.

Except for Katara.

After Ba Sing Se, Zuko can understand. But he wishes she could forgive him. If Katara would forgive him, Zuko knows, he could be part of their family. They seem so warm, all of them, huddled around their campfire. Happy, despite the rest of the world. Not carefree, but taking the time that they have, and _living_.

Zuko has never really had a family. He's beginning to think he's never really lived.

Katara is determined to hold fast in her stance on Zuko. She doesn't care, she tells herself. He had his chance to become part of their family. He chose his birth family instead. And what did it say about him, about his loyalty, that he would just go and change his mind; betray his own blood?

She's grateful, of course, that Aang will have a firebending teacher. She still plans to discretely supervise every one of their training sessions.

A corner of her mind tells her that Zuko looks pitiful, away from the rest of them, eating by the light of his own conjured fire. He's taken her warning to heart, it seems. Katara tells herself to be glad, though the part of herself that sees him lonely wants nothing more than to call him over and take care of him.

No.

* * *

Katara will stand firm. She will not forgive his betrayal of her under Ba Sing Se. Zuko's had his chances. He had a life, a family. He had a chance at their family. He lost it. And then he threw away the first one.

Zuko has had moments when he's felt he belonged here. Aang makes him instantly comfortable. Toph treats him with the same roughness as everyone else, although she has never again approached him while he was unaware. And the piggyback rides he gave her, the first few days, in atonement for burning her feet, she has demanded of almost everyone else in the group as well.

* * *

Zuko glances again at the campfire.

Katara is bending the soup into the bison Appa's mouth. She is graceful, and the firelight shows her to her best. Zuko realizes that she is beautiful. He thinks of Mai, and compares them. The two women have a different kind of grace from one another, he decides. Mai is sharp edges and steel. Katara is gentle. She moves like her element personified. He considers this. Another way that this family differs internally. If Katara moves like water, Aang moves like air, Haru and Toph like earth. He wonders if he moves like fire.

Perhaps it is not, after all, so bad to be unique in this family. Then all he needs is Katara's acceptance.

* * *

Katara can feel Zuko's eyes on her. She reminds herself to show no weakness, no sign that she knows he is watching. Though her heart cries out for her to let him closer, she will not endanger their family. Perhaps one day Zuko will prove himself to her satisfaction, but until then, she will be the silent defense against him.


	2. Change

**Change**

It should not matter so much to Zuko, that Katara forgives him.

It does anyway.

Zuko feels that he has been standing under a mountain all this time. Now, he thinks, he understands how Aang can be so free and light. Katara's acceptance means everything; _is_ everything.

He wishes he knew why.

* * *

Katara feels relaxed, now. She does not need to watch Zuko every moment. He understands, she thinks. He understands what vengeance is, and he understands that she couldn't. Katara imagines that he might even understand why. He acted like a friend, when he took her to find Yan Rah. He supported her until she had what she needed. Katara wonders if he would have stopped her if she had been able to continue.

It doesn't bother her as much as it should, that she thinks he wouldn't. Aang would have, she knows. But Zuko would have let her take that path. And he would have helped her live with herself afterwards. So her intuition tells her.

* * *

Zuko has learned an infinite number of things from his field trip with Katara. He knows that their greatest object on the path to victory is Aang's pacifism. He knows that Aang and Katara are both far better people than him. He would not have hesitated to kill Yan Rah. But have Katara hold her hand with ice daggers only millimeters from Yan Rah's throat, he understands why he should. He hopes that he regains that compassion-for-its-own-sake someday.

Zuko is awed by that in Katara. In the Avatar, for all the inconvenience to their quest, it seems fitting, but Katara has it too. It seems to him a miracle that such compassion could exist in her side-by-side with such a dangerous power as her skill with Waterbending. He imagines what his father, or Azula, might do if they controlled someone with the skill to do what he witnessed Katara do to the captain of the Southern Raiders. He doesn't even know exactly what she did, but it was terrifying. And beautiful. It is not without a certain morbidity that he notes that Katara fighting; Katara who is not spending her time mothering Aang and the rest of the group; is stunning.

This revelation makes it impossible for Zuko to sleep. He rises with a silence born from his flight across the Earth Kingdom, his time masquerading as the Blue Spirit. Zuko has no particular destination in mind. He lets feet take him where they will, and so makes the full tour of their cleaned-up and modified corner of the temple until he arrives before Katara's door. With a sigh, he folds himself into a sitting position, intent on meditating.

He falls asleep.

* * *

Katara is not sure what has woken her. It feels too early to wake for breakfast—she still feels the impression of the moon under her skin. Gathering moisture from the air, she cautiously opens her door—

—and finds Zuko, curled up around his sabers. For a moment, Katara feels her old suspicion revive. She quells it, however. He doesn't look malicious, even if he does have his swords to hand.

An idea comes to Katara. Stepping out of range of his swords, he carefully directs her bubble of water over Zuko's head, and allows it to splash down on his face.

Zuko wakes up spluttering, swords drawn, and Katara can't help but giggle.

He glares at her in reply. "What was that for?" He sheaths his sabers.

Katara schools her face into a stern expression. "Care to explain why you were armed and sleeping outside my door?"

Zuko flushes.

"Couldn't sleep," he mutters. His voice dropped further. "Kept…thinking…"

"About?"

Zuko flushes deeper. "Just leave it, will you?" He snarls.

Katara can't help teasing him. She takes a step toward him. "Aww… Zuko…_what_ could you have been thinking about?"

She did not predict the next part of the exchange.

* * *

Zuko thinks he will go mad. She is wearing next to nothing—only the white wrappings she wears for Waterbending training—and she is standing so close! He does the only thing he can do to keep his sanity.

He kisses her.


	3. Pain

**Pain**

Zuko can't look at her. They've managed to survive the battle. Aang has defeated Ozai. Zuko has been crowned Firelord, promptly named Iroh his Regent, citing the need to grow up a bit more, and left with his friends on Appa to organize the first peace conference of Ember Island.

And for two weeks, they've not exchanged a glance. Katara checks the healing of his chest a few times a day. A few times, sharing chores, Zuko has been able to watch her, hoping desperately for a sign that maybe, maybe she doesn't hate him for kissing her.

Ocaisionally, they exchange words and gestures. "Please," accompanied by a gesture of a bowl towards the pot of soup. "Thanks," from her, after he lights fire for cooking, or in each of the main rooms.

Zuko just wishes he knew what to do, what to say.

* * *

Katara is a little scared to talk to Zuko. She doesn't know what to expect. Would he kiss her again? What would she say to him? And most frightening: does she want him to kiss her again?

Part of her does.

And that's the thing that hurts most of all; that makes her chest tight and her breathing shallow.

She doesn't know what she'll say to Zuko. Nor to Aang, who has made it clear he loves her, who has given up so much….

She remembers Jet, and his treachery, and his final sacrifice for her. Zuko and Aang would be safer they had no care for her—the life her destiny has given her attracts danger. Katara often curses her frequent inability to be independent.

Mostly, though, she wishes that she could know her own mind enough to do something about this _thing_ with Zuko. It's tearing her up, not knowing.

* * *

Zuko has given up being confused.

Now, he is angry. With whom, or about what, he cannot say, exactly. But he can no longer stand the awkward silences, and so he retreats to harshness. Katara is fortunate that they rarely speak, and so she has been spared the cutting edge of Zuko's tongue. The others have not been so lucky, and even Aang is growing concerned.

But Zuko cannot make his anger last forever—it is like fire: eating away until it reaches its final source of food and collapses.

It happens when he accompanies her to shop for more supplies. They're halfway through the forest on the way back to the house. She looks calm and collected, and it makes him furious that she should not be as tormented as he. She asks him something over her shoulder. Zuko doesn't know what it is, can't hear it for the pounding of his anger. Before he can stop himself, he bursts out: "Say something that _means_ something, damn you!"

Katara spins, shocked.

"Stop acting like it was nothing, like—" then their eyes meet. And Zuko sees the pain and confusion in her eyes, and is filled with shame for his harshness. "Damn it," he whispers, and runs.

* * *

Katara knows now. It meant something to Zuko. What, she's not sure. But he's as much in pain over this as she is, and all she wants to do is run to him and—she can't. She's let Aang kiss her twice now, and even though the battle is over, she doesn't think she could bear breaking his heart. Even though the price is her heart, and Zuko's.

But doing nothing is tearing her to pieces. If she could only find a way to make everyone happy—

Zuko comes charging back through the trees. He stops short, whispers, "I'm sorry," and leans over and kisses her.

Katara drops her bags of groceries.

For a long minute, nothing matters. Then her senses begin to return and Katara pulls away, her heart breaking as she shakes her head even as she leans into him to sob into his shoulder. "We can't. We have to think of Aang, and Mai, and what would happen—the Fire Nation won't accept you having a Water Tribe peasant for a girlfriend."

These are the words Zuko never wanted to hear.

Nor Aang, nor Sokka, conveniently hidded behind a bush, spying on their friends to find out what had been causing all the tension.

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**A/N: apologies for the delay-this chapter required major overhaul, which will result in some extra work on the next four chapters as well. But the earlier version...just wasn't cutting it. Hope this version lives up to everyone's expectations. Also...I don't ask for reviews, but I would like to thank **sokkantylee **and **Lady Flick **for writing some anyway.**

**Alshain**


	4. Date

**Date**

Here they are, sitting on the Ember Island beach, basking in the twilight. Zuko is certain he'd never seen anything so beautiful as Katara, backed by the sea and the setting sun. She is everything. She fills his life with light. Zuko remembers dates with Mai. He was never entranced by her, always retaining his own mind, always thinking.

Katara won't let him think, much. He has to feel, and do. Otherwise, his gestures fall flat, and she accuses him of insincerity. Sometimes he upsets her even when he isn't thinking. But always, he apologizes, and kisses her hand, and she giggles and smiles, and he knows that he is still in her good graces. He hasn't messed up tonight. Yet.

* * *

Katara is just happy to be with Zuko. They don't need to talk, really. One of them would just put their foot in their mouth if they tried to talk.

Katara reaches out and puts a hand on Zuko's knee. Shy. He moves around the fire to be closer to her. In the flickering light, Katara can see his scar. He let her try to heal it, once. At the end of the session, she'd been exhausted, and the scar was merely fainter. But it doesn't look so angry anymore. It's a closed scar, white lines on his face, and Katara barely notices it, except as a distinctive feature that adds to his looks. Zuko's the most attractive boy she knows, actually. She will always remember the look on his face when she woke up two days after attempting the healing, to his face, and the words, whispered as she looks at what she's wrought: thank you.

She takes his hand, and smiles at him. Talking with her eyes. _Zuko, I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know if this is love, but I've never been this happy._

_His eyes seem to return her sentiments, her joy-in-the-now, joy in their togetherness._

* * *

Zuko is grateful that she's with him. Somehow even with all the anger in the air, with all her good intentions and good reasons, she's with Zuko now. They're taking some time for themselves, away from the group that is fractured because of this. But they can't let it go. None of them are ready to go home, and Aang won't accept Katara dating him out of duty. They've stolen moments like these for weeks, as they've traveled, spreading word and rule of the Avatar's peace as they invite the leaders of the world to the Ember Island Peace Conference, representing each nation each time they stop.

Zuko pulls Katara into his lap, wraps his arms around her, and holds her tightly.

"Katara?"

Zuko has begun to speak. Katara hopes he won't mess it up.

"I love you."

She trembles in his arms, which don't let go, don't let her distance herself from this.

"I love you too." She chokes out.

"When…whenever we stop traveling so much…I'd like to take you. On a real, fancy date."

Katara wants to stop him, but he continues.

"I'd like to be with you forever, you know. But I thought we should start with just the normal things, before we think about forever."

Katara manages to turn around in his arms and kiss him.

"You're perfect," Katara whispers into his shoulder. "I'm so glad you understand." She kisses him again, and this time, they fall down to the sand, arms around each other. Zuko breaks the kiss so that he can gaze into her eyes. She's so beautiful. So beautiful.

Katara's eyes light with an idea and she pulls him up to standing, then draws him toward the sea. Zuko follows, giddy, as they wade in. Then Katara bends the water around them, making a shield of water.

Zuko kisses her, and the water collapses, soaking them both. They are beyond caring. He summons warmth and dries them, and they stand together in the spray, kissing. Then they put out their fire and walk back to the beach house together, in that close, tentative way, knowing that their paradisal moment is fading.

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**A/N: I'm sorry for the delay...as you all know, (yes, you people, out there. If any of you are still reading this story.) "Real Life" gets in the way, and that's what has happened here. The good news is that the rest of the story should be up in the next week or so. Thanks to those of you who reviewed, who added the story to their Alerts list or Favorites. I'm glad you're enjoying it.**


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